-Originally aired September 13, 1986.
-Your hosts are Jim Ross & Hacksaw Jim Duggan. Interesting to see Duggan at this point, because the deal with him in real life right now is that he’s made it known that he wants to go to the WWF, but Watts was one of the first promoters to figure out “I gotta have contracts now” and he held Duggan to his to make a point to the rest of the locker room. And I can’t blame him. Not just because the WWF was taking over the world but because Duggan was so clearly “the guy” once JYD left and Watts looked right past him.
-Jim Ross reads a LONG list of new stations throughout the country that are now airing the UWF, and it’s heartbreaking to hear signs that the company was growing right before they just absolutely hit a brick wall.
-Oh, also, Jim Duggan tells an anecdote about visiting his dad, the Glens Falls Chief of Police, and going to a police convention where they made Hacksaw stop at the door and get searched, like they were expecting to find something.
(Spongebob narrator: “Nine months later…”)
GUSTAVO MENDOZA vs. GARY YOUNG
-Young snapmares Mendoza into a side headlock. Slam and an armbar by Young. Mendoza rallies with a suplex and a splash for two, but he misses a corner charge and Young rolls him up for three.
ONE MAN GANG & WILD BILL IRWIN (with Skandar Akbar & Savannah Jack) vs. JEFF GAYLORD & JEFF RAITZ
-JR reports a rumor that Akbar has Gang on a special diet to get his weight up to 500 pounds. Must have heard that rumor from Gorilla Monsoon. Gang knocks his opponents around, and Irwin tags in to help with a suplex/splash combo for a speedy win.
FOR THE HELD-UP TAG TEAM TITLE: THE FANTASTICS vs. “Hot Stuff” EDDIE GILBERT & STING (with Hollywood John Tatum & Missy Hyatt)
-JR makes me do a double-take by saying that in the UWF, they aren’t interested in knocking the competition. He just wants the fans to come see the UWF and judge for themselves, because he thinks the UWF is delivering the best action anywhere in the country.
-JR teases that this match will last the rest of the TV hour as Bobby Fulton and Eddie Gilbert start off with a fist fight. Fulton wins that battle and takes a shot at Sting for good measure.
-Eddie gets double-teamed for a one-count as JR makes it a point to say that Carl Fergie is officiating this match…NOT Eddie’s dad Tommy. I think they really, really, really had a payoff in mind with Tommy eventually but Danny Davis got so much heat so fast in the WWF that I think it made the UWF chicken out to avoid looking like copycats.
-Sting tags in and ducks a corner charge, stomping away at Bobby. Eddie tags in and gives Bobby a knee to the back. Bobby throws kicks and manages to tag in Tommy, and if we’re doing the hot tag now I don’t think we’re going the full hour. All four men brawl and the referee gets wiped out in the action. Sting and Fulton end up on the floor, with Rogers and Gilbert remaining in the ring. Tatum gets on the apron for a double-team, but he misses and Gilbert gets bodypressed.
-Onto plan B, as Tatum just comes off the top rope and gives Rogers a knee to the back of the head. Dark Journey and the Missing Link hurry to ringside, and Link comes off the top rope and crashes onto Gilbert. By this point, the partners have made it back into the ring, and the referee recovers as Tatum and Link are brawling along with the two tag teams, and we have a double disqualification. Post-match, Dark Journey gets her hands on Missy to a big pop, but Missy escapes. Solid match.
-Ted DiBiase says that nobody hits him with a strap and gets away with it, so he challenges Michael Hayes to a strap match.
TV TITLE: TERRY TAYLOR (Champion) vs. MICHAEL P.S. HAYES
-Hayes sunset flips Taylor for a quick two-count. Taylor comes back with a slam for a one-count. Taylor wrings the arm but Hayes fights him off with right hands. Bodypress by Taylor gets two. Taylor just does another bodypress and gets another two, and it’s interesting to see two guys clashing with the “win as fast as possible” strategy.
-Backdrop by Taylor. Hayes ducks a bodypress and Taylor gets AIR, going through the ropes and clearing the ring announcer and the timekeeper’s heads on the way to the concrete. Taylor is bleeding when he gets back into the ring. Bulldog by Hayes gets a two-count. Hayes goes for a side suplex, but Taylor slips out of the grip and rolls him up for a sudden three-count to retain. Hayes is so damn mad that he beats up the referee and steals his belt, whipping him until, as you’ve already guessed, Ted DiBiase comes to the rescue.
VALET FOR A DAY: THE MISSING LINK (with Dark Journey) vs. HOLLYWOOD JOHN TATUM (with Missy Hyatt & Eddie Gilbert)
-The winner’s woman gets the services of the loser’s woman for one day.
-Fight starts during the ring introductions, with Tatum starting it and regretting it quickly. Tatum shakes off the cobwebs quickly and clotheslines Link. Link comes back with axehandles. Gilbert distracts the referee while Missy hits Link on the back with her loaded purse. This leads to a valet chase around the ring. Gilbert tries to take advantage of that distraction by climbing onto the top rope, but with PERFECT timing, Dark Journey reaches up during the chase and pushes Eddie onto Tatum, and Link dives on top for a three-count. Missy cries at realizing she has to do actual WORK for one day while Eddie & John argue over whose fuck-up this was.
-Back from commercial, Jim Ross looks absolutely shocked by SOMETHING that happened during the commercial break, and he’d like to tell us about us or show the footage, but he can’t because for some reason, Skandar Akbar is in the ring and he says One Man Gang wants to tell us something. One Man Gang surprises everybody by challenging two guys to matches: Hacksaw Jim Duggan…….and Terry Gordy. Hmmmmm…At least Duggan is game. He charges right at Gang and we have a brawl in the aisle as the credits roll.
